I don’t know whether this is something I heard before and I need to attribute it to somebody, or whether it just popped up into my own twisted brain, but I thought “you know peoples’ problems are like armpits; everybody’s got them and generally you’ll be a lot happier if you can just keep your nose out of them”. In any case, there’s a lot of truth to the observation. Sometimes, though, people just need to share their burdens with someone and it’s a good thing when we can help somebody carry their load.
This time it was our turn. A lady we know told us about this friend of hers, maybe, in her mind her only friend, who no matter where they go or what they do seems to use our friend as her own personal Go Fund Me account. She gets her to buy their meals, pay for gas, help her with the bills, and of course, she’s going to pay her back out of her next paycheck, but does it ever happen? Noooo it does not! You have got to quit enabling that woman" I said, "It’s just unhealthy what you’re doing!”
I know that the term “enabling” is a modern catchphrase, but it is a very appropriate and concise word. At one time it meant the same thing as “empowering” or helping someone accomplish something
that they could not do by themselves. It sounds like love in action, doesn’t it? But today, enabling is something quite different.
The Betty Ford Foundation puts it this way. “Enabling behavior, simply put, shields people from experiencing the full impact and consequences of their behavior. Enabling is different from helping and supporting in that it allows the enabled person to be irresponsible.”
Enabling is not love in action.
The Urban Dictionary describes the enabler this way “enabling can be as destructive as the behavior itself . . . A person enabling a destructive behavior is motivated by their need to do so and is gratified by reinforcing their superiority or control over that person; an "enabler" holds a person in an inferior state by denying them the motivation to change and therefore, the opportunity to grow."
What does God do instead of enabling? Instead of trying to ease our frustration and growing pains and soften and smooth out the path before us, in case we might happen to trip and fall? How does He show his love for his children?
First, He saved us.
God did for us what we could not do for ourselves and live. He paid our debt in full!
John 3:16 "For God so loved the world that he gave his only begotten son that whoever would believe in Him, that is put their confidence in him, their life and future in his hands, then He would make sure that they would not perish, that is be lost, ruined, destroyed, put to death (which by the way is our natural portion without Christ), but instead would experience life everlasting."
Second, He makes us secure.
He changed our location to a safer place; the kingdom. (Sorry you can only see it with the eyes of faith)
Colossians 1:13 "Who hath delivered us from the power of darkness, and hath translated us into the kingdom of his dear Son."
He took us from a hostile environment where we were under the power of beings we can’t see under normal circumstances, who have several thousand years of accumulated knowledge on which buttons to push in order to get us to surrender to their will, and He transferred us into his kingdom, where He is king, where nothing can hurt us or touch us except by his leave or permission. Neither Satan nor all the demonic powers of hell can do anything to you unless the Father, who is also their king, gives them permission to.
Lastly, He equips us for success.
1 Corinthians 10:13 "No temptation has seized you that isn’t common to all people. But God is faithful. He won’t allow you to be tempted beyond your abilities. Instead, with the temptation, God will also supply a way out so that you will be able to endure it."
I don’t think I know anybody who really understands just how big a deal that is! You may not pass the test before you, but it will never be because it’s beyond your ability to do so.
You will never be able to exploit him and He has no intention of enabling you. He is however willing to be engaged with you in a healthy parent/child relationship where you are the child who knows a tiny bit, and he is the Father who knows everything.
Will he throw down a pillow for you to fall on if you stumble? No. How do we learn not to touch a hot flame? We experience what it feels like getting burned. How many of us need to do it more than once? Hopefully not many. Will he guarantee that you succeed in this life? No! But He did give you whatever you need to live it out of his riches in glory by Christ Jesus.
Sometimes He helps us. Sometimes He lets us and/or waits on us to help ourselves.
Sometimes He supplies the need, but sometimes he makes us wait for a while because He wants us to learn the lessons that come with not having what we need He designs our curriculum. But it is rarely about us having our way or getting what we ask for. It's all about what He wants, what He is doing, how He will fit us into the big picture and make us fit to take part in His plan.
The bottom line is that God loves you so much He gave His son to pay your ransom. But that is not the end of the story. There is a world out there that picks up where your boundaries end and a lot of those in that world are dying not knowing anything about the life and love and hope that only comes from knowing Jesus, and we all need to understand that God loves those people every bit as much as He loves you.
God is not going to enable (that is, do it for you) you in sharing the Word. He may not even empower you to do it. He just asks you to throw out the nets. Sometimes He will cause the net to come up empty,
sometimes He’ll cause it to come up full. You don’t have to worry about that. Just show up and throw the net.
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